Let your kids be them and not you.

I haven’t done a Sunday Thought in a  while, in part due to a lack of energy. Okay, so it is all due to lack of energy, but today I figure why not. I’ll take a nap afterwards. 2 hours of sleep in the last 36 hours or so just doesn’t cut it.

So today I wanted to talk about something I care about a lot and that’s the encouragement of children. This won’t be a long one or a revelation one. It’s simple.

We look around today and see all the madness in America involving racial issues, violence, and all sorts of things. Some things are improving but a lot of things are worse or seem to be with the ease of reporting what’s happening now over how it was so many years ago.

I don’t tell my son to go out and treat people a certain way. In fact it rarely comes up. The only time it does is when there are bullies at school. Bullies are a bit silly when it comes to my son. If my son ever really wanted to deal with one in a physical way, the bully would be hurting for a while, but physical isn’t my boy “B”s first thought. Just like it’s never been mine. For me it may be a day later before the slow burn gets to me and I wish I had done this or that, but in truth wouldn’t have anyway.

I’m proud of what my son has accomplished this year in school. He’s one of only two kids in his grade to be recognized and accepted into an academically gifted student talent search program by one of the top universities in the country and the world. He’s 10. He said the other students looked at him kind of strange when he walked down the hall after Honor’s Day and it was announced to the school. I think maybe he just was noticing something that wasn’t there. But I told him to be proud of it.

My focus with my son is on him being him. And the beset whatever him that means. He and I share a lot of the same characteristics and interests but I consciously make an effort not to put my wishes on him. He’s turning out to be better than I was, if not a little more headstrong than I was. Stubborn? Imagine that.

I thought I would share a picture of “B” today. No, not an actual photo but my portrait from a photo taken at Honor’s Day with his ribbon showing his acceptance into the program. I missed the program. The email came out the night before at a time no one checks their email. But the school takes pictures and puts them up for all of us to see. So here you are. Now you sort of know what B looks like.


Much Respect


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9 thoughts on “Let your kids be them and not you.

  1. Congratulations to your son! You must be so proud of him! I’m with you- my kids are older but I always encouraged them to just be themselves. My only dreams for them are that they live happy productive lives . Each one is very unique and I would not change a single thing about them. I know too many people who push their own agendas and unresolved issues onto their kids and that’s just wrong.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. […] Connecting with people is something you have to work at. Okay, so it comes naturally for some people. This article is being written with the current 1000 Voices for Compassion theme of Connection in mind. Oddly it goes along with something I’ve been thinking of for some time now and carries over from something I wrote previously in my Let your Kids be them and not you. […]


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