For those reading today, please keep in mind there is a bit of humor in the truth of the situations I will be sharing.

Sometimes there are moments in a man’s life when he just doesn’t know what to say. Some of us know in those moments to do the obvious . . . shut up. And then there are the other 90% of our gender. It doesn’t matter who your partner is, the male brain still has this innate ability to say the wrong things, even after deep, deep consideration–for those two seconds before opening mouth.

 

” Are you ready?”

To many men reading today they are thinking “What’s wrong with that?” Your significant one has a brand new shirt on and you don’t know if that means ready or not. They are wearing their ‘around the house’ clothes and you don’t realize it. You have just admitted your lack of attention and you are also coming across as impatient.

The alternative?

“Do I need to get ready yet?”

or even better

“Give me a 10 minute warning for when I need to get ready.”

That’s right. Have your clothes ready or even already be ready and the only thing left are perhaps shoes or getting your keys and jacket/coat.

“What’s for dinner?”

Yeah, you did it that time. You are assuming they will be making dinner. Perhaps that isn’t what you meant, but that’s what you just said.

The alternative?

“What sounds good for dinner tonight?”

At this point suggestions are made and possibly a division of cooking assignments are volunteered for.

“Did you . . .”

I wont even finish that one. Anytime you begin a sentence, a question with “Did you”, a mistake has been made. You are now about to make an accusation of forgetfulness. I know, I know that is not what you were going after but that is what is heard. Be honest, don’t you feel that way when it is said to you?

The alternative?

Depending on what it is, check for yourself if whatever it is was done. If not something you can check on then tread lightly.

All I can say here is ask a question that depends on whatever it is having been done.  For example; perhaps you are planning a trip to the mountains and all that is being waited on is the car being serviced. You could go to the car and check to see if it has been, look for a receipt, or even call the place where it would have been done, but if you are still not that motivated then perhaps this will work for you;

“Do you want to go to the mountains this weekend?”

I was going to add, “before the leaves have fallen” but that would have implied pressure to have something done. In this day and age none of us wants that.

“Is that okay with you?

Seems harmless enough but it implies the “This is what I want and I expect you to agree” thing.

The alternative?

“What do you think?”

I know, you are opening up a huge range of possibilities, or just two that you care about. Your way or their way, which would be any other way but your own. Well that’s when you have to learn.

Just a few of those phrases I’ve learned over the years. Some might help. Put some variation in it or they will know what you are doing as you answer or speak the same way each time.

Ronovan

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