Humor on Thursdays. Cause we NEED IT!!!

A little fun for today. Why? BECAUSE WE NEED IT!!! We’ve blogged too much already!!! LAUGH A LITTLE!!!!

And now here is your laugh for today. Enjoy.

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Who can I be without my ISP?

Log: Blog *Pot 558
Today I discovered ISP Central is full of idiots intelligent beings. Previous broadcasted message stated all of region with problems. Now being sent a new communication device for computer system. ISP Central stated I did not have IP service while I was in search engine looking for another ISP in region. Unfortunately they have monopoly a wonderful service that means we need no other provider.
Due to last communication, ISP Central has proven they are indeed idiots most intelligent beings. No IP while in the middle of using IP?
Consumed coffee today. Large cup, half coffee, half sugar. It is fortunate ISP Central are idiots intelligent beings and psychic. My lack of ability to force opinions on various subjects at this moment may be wise. The ability to speak with speed has increased by 100 times. Clarity of thought by 1000 times. Ability to sensor has decreased by infinity. Society, politicians, and stupid parenting has been saved by caffeine and sugar overdose. I don’t drink caffeine. It’s been a trip. Locals have had an ear full. Your loss is their misery.
Other than the above, today has been like many other days, but only more and less so. More writing on two different novels. Less blogging about nonsense. Going through withdrawals from missing blog hotties that visit my location. Hove is Hottie central as you all know. Muse about the meaning of that one if you will. Tongue in cheekie I am today. I’ll leave that last sentence as is. I’m feeling playful. Darn it Jim, I’m a Writer not a Priest. Darn it all, I’m a layman, not a pastor. Yeah, going to go with that one too. You’re welcome.
Will update as able to. Haiku Review Communication will be in best form possible. Perhaps not as entertaining as I hope the last one was. Although have not received many LOL communications from victims participants.
Space Ranger Ronovan Out.

Space Ranger RonovanWhat Pirate Captain Rasmus Bergman of the Pirate Tales series of books would look like in black and white and if he was Space Ranger Ronovan.

Communication has been reviewed by Interplanetary Safety Protectorate (ISP) for your protection and modified were deemed appropriate for clarity and fact.

*(Pol-One full Planetary Rotation.)

Mark W.

I wish I had Jessie’s Cave Girl.

A little nostalgia and a little humor. Rick Springfield fans get ready. Rick Springfield haters–enjoy. Music drops in at around 1 minute, so wait for it. 🙂 And no, your speakers aren’t broken, that first minute is mono.

Raquel Welch from One Million Years B.C.

#TimHawkins a #ManTruth.

Tim Hawkins is a comedian who happens to be a Christian. This means usually family friendly comedy. The guy is hilarious. Here he is in a 2 minute clip about marriage conflict resolution and texting.

Sunday Golf and the hard headed.

As you may have read in my last post I have been given the challenge to share three quotes with you in three consecutive posts by Greg of Potholes in the Road of Life.

Let me tell a little story.

A preacher repeatedly heard from his friends about the joys of playing golf on Sunday. Sunday players got a discount, they said, yet the golf course was never overcrowded like it was during the rest of the week. It was so peaceful, that a person could really concentrate on his game.

Being a man of the cloth, of course, the preacher worked on Sunday. But, also being a avid golf fan, the preacher found the temptation to try the Sunday game strong and persistent.  Finally, the preacher gave in. He called his assistant to say he was sick and to turn the sermon over to him. Then, he grabbed his clubs and headed for the golf course.

The day was sunny and bright. The course was peaceful and quiet. His friends were right. Sunday was a perfect day to play golf.

But, up in heaven, God and his angels were watching the preacher as he set up his first tee. “God,” said the smallest angel, “You have to do something about this! The man is a preacher! This isn’t right!”

“Don’t worry,” said God. “I’ve got the situation well in hand.”

The preacher took his swing. THWAK!!! The ball wisked through the air straight and true as an arrow. HOLE IN ONE!!!!!!!

At the second hole, the preacher takes a swing, and gets ANOTHER HOLE IN ONE!!!!!!

Finally, after all 18 holes, the priest has gotten a hole in one at EVERY HOLE!!!!!

“But, God!” cried the smallest angel. “This is terrible! How could you let him get a hole in one every time, when he shouldn’t even be playing golf today?”

God turned to the angel with a smile. “Who can he tell about it?”

I told that story one Sunday morning as I stood before the church stalling for time as the choir director and choir were late to arrive and we were on radio and could not have dead air. The only problem is I did not tell the story that well.

As I reflected on it I realized why. I have an aversion to golf. No, don’t get me wrong. I love golf. I enjoy watching a small amount of it at times. All those beautiful greens.

I even went golfing with my father. He tried to show me the game and I was not bad at it. He even gave me a set of clubs.

One day we were on the fairway and he pulls out a driver, a wood. This would end up being a fortunate thing. He wanted me to watch his swing to see how to do it.

He placed me in position to get the best look. About 20 seconds later a 16 year old boy named Ronovan was grateful the club had been a wood instead of an iron. You see the wood is large and slightly rounded. The iron, well the name says it all.

Ronovan was grateful because the head of the club hit him squarely, dead center in the forehead. Ronovan did not fall down. He did not cry. He did not even make a sound.

He did get  to drive the golf car the rest of the game and have a very nice meal afterwards.

I tell that story to show why I believe I did not do well at telling the previous story. I have an aversion to golf. Well that and the fact we were live on radio and my part of the service was finished on time and I had nothing left to go with. There is just so many times you can say Happy Birthday to the two little old ladies, especially when one was so proud of being the oldest lady in the church and was very smug about it.

A quote? I know that’s where this was to lead.

1 Timothy 4:16a ESV

“Keep a close watch on yourself and on the teaching.”