Love Connection. A #BeWoW and #1000Speak Poem.

Sometimes you need to lose a connection to find a connection. One you have may not be the one you need. Once that one is lost, or ended, a new one may enter your life. Connections come and go. Don’t dwell on the lost ones. Focus on the ones not yet made, or the one newly made that may have been the reason for your existence.

Always be open and aware of words and actions. Combined they can tell you the truth. If they conflict, so long. If they agree, then awesome.

This is another entry for the #BeWoW and #1000Speak for today dealing with Connecting.

Love-Connection

Next Door
Long Distance
Brick Walls
No Resistance
 
Coping All
Always Well
Frequent Falls
Temporary Hell
 
Within Sight
Within Sound
Wishing Blind
Heaven Found
 
No Reason
Every Moment
Forgotten Purpose
Eternal Appointment
 
Madness Mayhem
Quiet Peace
Constant Pain
Sweet Release
 
Decision Made
Belonging Heart
Leaving Away
Never Apart

 Much Respect

Ronovan

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5 Ways to Connect with Your Children #1000Speak

Connecting with people is something you have to work at. Okay, so it comes naturally for some people. This article is being written with the 1000 voices speak for compassioncurrent 1000 Voices for Compassion theme of Connection in mind. Oddly it goes along with something I’ve been thinking of for some time now and carries over from something I wrote previously in my Let your Kids be them and not you.

I’m not a strong connector these days, and haven’t been for the past couple of years. I was prior to that but now I am more of a recluse. That being said, there are people you can’t and shouldn’t be a recluse from—Your Children.

I look at a lot of problems today and I personally believe a lot of them could have been prevented if a good and healthy connection had been established and maintained between the parent and child. Notice I said a “good and healthy” connection.

My son goes to school before I get up in the mornings. Often times I am asleep when he comes home. Chronic Fatigue is part of my Fibromyalgia so I really have no control over when I will drop off and sleeping problems mess things up as well. Thus, when I am with my son I need to make certain there is that connection. It may be only a look or a couple of words but there needs to be something positive and building going on.

5 Ways Parents Connect To Their Children

  1. Be Less Self: I know you don’t think of yourself as begin selfish but when you consider that very often you are molding your child to be what you want them to be instead of what they should be, you are being selfish. This is in regards to utilization of talents and intellect. We should all try to mold our children into being good people, so don’t even think about going off on me about that.
  2. Listen: Children like to talk, IF they have parents that like to listen. You may not like to listen—Pretend. Listen to your child and respond to them. Acknowledge you have heard what they said. Your child will grow in confidence, social abilities and even vocabulary.
  3. Be Aware: Paying attention to your child will give you ideas and clues about their likes, dislikes, desires, goals, wishes. You will see where they thrive. I know my son. From the time he could stand and throw a ball, and I mean literally just that, he could throw a strike down the hallway to me. I knew then that baseball would be the sport he would thrive at. Did I push him to it? No. I personally wanted him to play football, but through the years I changed my mind. Knowing my son, I see that he likes to know what his assignment is, do his assigned task and still be a part of a team. Also he is not a very aggressive type physically. Football is out. Basketball? He’s tried it and it is mayhem at his age because other kids don’t do their assigned tasks on the team. But baseball? He is the starting outfielder his first year playing. I mean that as in they put him where they know a team hits to most. He is also the clean-up hitter. That means he is their power hitter. His first year playing. I also can pick out a book I know he will like. Why? Because he is like me and I’ve noticed it. He likes non-fiction books and will be watching a documentary on public television he turned to.
  4. Patient: Here is a big one. Patience is a hard thing to be at times. But if you are a screamer, a yeller, you will not connect with your child. And if you are a physical punisher to a bit of the extreme, you will definitely not connect. I know that one personally. Kids do dumb things at times. You will think your kid is mature one moment and then do something completely their age the next and it will make you so mad. Just remember their age and take deep breaths and count to a million.
  5. Affectionate: Here is another tough one, especially for a lot of men. Hug your child, no matter their age. Why? So you can teach them hugging and being affectionate is normal and a hug is a sign of love. Left on their own and without a role model, they will turn elsewhere. Hugging will turn into something not simply meant as a sign of love and affection for someone. Also words are signs of affection. Tell your child you love them. Tell them you are proud of them for random things. Or maybe say “That was awesome” to something random. Don’t reserve those words for good grades or athletic achievements.

Connecting with your child teaches them to connect with others and that takes care of a lot of things out there. You may not realize it but they are learning all those things you are doing, each of those five things I mentioned above, simply by observing what you are doing. They know you are listening, they know you are being patient.

By modeling for them these characteristics we are helping the future.

Duke-Tip-Award

 

Much Respect

Ronovan

 

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The Unity of Humanity My #BeWoW article.

I’ve been very concerned about the racial tensions in the US. I’m not concerned for myself personally as my relationships are fine with all walks of life. As I’ve said before, I don’t see races not do I treat people as races. I’m not sure if my song got that from me or not but he’s friends with everyone.

As everywhere I look I see these almost indoctrination like attempts by media and politics to force on all of us the idea we ARE different I become incredibly angry.

Why do people allow others, others who make money through ratings on fear, dictate how we think and live?

Smart is smart, funny is funny, talented is talented, and beautiful is beautiful. Those are things we have in common across the board of humanity. Oh, and yes, ugly is ugly and dumb is dumb. I know, not nice things to say, but I know I’m not good looking, and I’m not the smartest new kid on the block. I’m okay with it. I know there is another person in another country with the exact same ugly and lack of smarticles that I have but with a different skin tone or regional facial features.

Having completed the A to Z Blogging Challenge using a comic book creators around the world as a theme, I discovered even more how much alike we all are. People from different countries inspired to do something for the same reasons, and some giving almost identical answers to questions that are very personal.

My positive message today is through everything always remember we are all the same, just in different situations. Don’t listen to and allow constant bombardment of negativity make it a reality.

 

Much Respect

Ronovan

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Nurturing is Genuine.

For me there is some difficulty when it comes to face to face relationships since my accident over a year ago. It might be the memory issues. Perhaps the fear of people. Somewhere along the way . . . hmm, maybe it’s all of it together.

As a father I have to get over it at times. I guess when I am able to get into those moments of discussion and encouragement and help my son grow, he knows it’s the real thing. And there I believe lies true nurturing.

Humans are very perceptive when it comes to fakes or genuines. Yes, another of my made up words. Perhaps I will create a comic book called The Genuines and the enemies will be The Deceptives.

“Focus, Ronovan.”

“Okay, okay, I will.”

My son is very perceptive. He knows when someone truly cares about him when they are discussing things that are to encourage and help him. He doesn’t need encouragement. I suppose encouragement is great in its place but nurturing is really the thing that is needed.

When you nurture you are giving of yourself, your feelings are shared, your time, your blood, your sweat and tears. Even an infant knows the difference between the genuine and the deceptive.

My son, aged 10, began his first season of baseball this year. No one believes it. He was apparently born to play the game. Perhaps it was the hours of throwing balls to him over the summer that helped some, the explaining how baseball works, how to properly run the bases, how to relay the ball. It was a sport I could explain and he could learn that carried over. I suppose it helped I took coaching of baseball in college.

But what is really helping him are the coaches. He has the best coaches in his league. I don’t say that because they are winning, I say that because their mentality of growing young kids into loving baseball, and training them the right way, and not just about technique.

The hitting coach even took time with my son “B” before practice, since it was early, and went through a couple of things with him, and told him he was the most naturally gifted hitter and player he had ever seen. He didn’t have to say that. And his actions back up his words.

I take the guys words as truth because of his background. He played college ball, football and baseball at the same University I went to, but ended up with baseball after the first season and was even scouted by the pros. He still plays in leagues that we have here that aren’t for pros. Oh, did I mention his father was a two time football Super Bowl Champion?

Encouragement without sincerity is just smoke. It’s a commercial for a toy that kids know won’t work. My son even explains to me why the toys won’t work when he sees the ads.

Again, I wasn’t going to do a post today, but it’s #1000Speak for Compassion with the topic of Nurturing. I opened the page and this happened without a thought.

Nurturing can be from adult to adult as well. I  have people, person, something like that, not only encouraging my writing but taking steps to nurture along the way to lead in the direction of improvement. Not so much teaching me technique but being honest with me.

Nurturing is not simply being a cheerleader, nurturing is sometimes be the tough guy for the better. The other person won’t always like it, but through a history with you, they know it is for the better and will go with it.

No matter what you do, with whomever you do it with, nurture. It reminds me of one of my favorite verses.

“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.”~Ephesians 4:29

If those who follow these words only fulfilled these words, would it not be a wonderful world? I try. I fail at times, I am sure, but I try.

1000 voices speak for compassion

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Taylor Swift and Mean For #1000Speak on Bullying.

1000 voices speak for compassion1000 Voices Speak for Compassion is Speaking about Bullying. I’ve written a couple of articles already. I wanted to share a music video. Taylor Swift and Mean fits quite well. One thing I like about it? I can understand the words. Always great with a song. Listen to it, even if you don’t like Taylor Swift.