Swirling Bliss.

Round the heart love spins,

Like a swirling pool of bliss,

The water drains deep.

For my challenge this week.

Pure and Evergreen.

I wrote you letters on your doorstep in late December
Painted through thoughts pure and evergreen

Never knew they would be so briefly held to matter
Why are they memories that won’t escape me

You don’t want to know me

Do you even care
Are you even aware
Do you ever remember loving me

Does your mind dare
Does it go there
Does it ever remember knowing me

I spelled your name in the sky through my bedroom window
Never will I be able to look that way again

I try to write a letter so you will remember
Tears blur the words until I can’t see

My heart burns so
My chest tightens to know
Please, oh please come crucify me

Loving you is a matter of a contradiction
Do you know what that means

Please, oh please you crucify me

 
 

 
 

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#1000Speak Hello, nice to meet you . . . again.

1000 Voices Speak for Compassion.1000 voices speak for compassion

As I write this it’s the 19th and something nagged at me the 20th was a date I should know. I logged on to facebook and saw a 1000 Voices for Compassion update. It’s a group for bloggers that I think the name of speaks for itself. Now here I am writing. Good thing I joined the group at some point. Not sure when, but I did.

People forget all the time. People instantly think of Alzheimer’s patients when you start talking about memory problems. We’ve learned to have compassion for them.

But there are other reasons people forget. You have accidents that result in concussions, brain damage, and that can be a problem.

Have you ever wondered about people with amnesia? Have you ever wondered what it’s like to be an adult and not know 40 years worth of memories, people, history? Have you ever wondered how to deal with people like that? Probably not.

Let’s play pretend.

You look completely healthy. Actually you look healthier than before your accident. People look at you and have no clue anything is wrong. You might have to ask one of the simplest things you should know and people will think you are joking.

The responses range from a laugh and answer, to a curse and walking off. All you want to know is where the cooking oil is or which aisle the peanut butter is on.

Imagine if you will, walking in to a store and each time it is a brand new store, no matter how many times you walk in to the store. As far as you know have never been in that store.

Okay, let’s change that. Let’s say you wake up and you don’t know where you are. You look beside you and see a notebook that is opened to a page that says ‘Read Me’. Reading you now know your name, where you are, what is wrong with you, and how to find the restroom in the house because there is a hand drawn map on one of the pages you are told to read.

Imagine that is you every morning because not only do you have amnesia but you have short term memory problems as well.

Then you have to deal with people being mean to you. You are nice to everyone. You even cover your being afraid by joking with the cashier while the 70 year-old woman who drives you places is paying for the groceries.

Now imagine people you know, who talk to you each day, wanting you to be the exact person you were before. But you can’t. You don’t know how you became the person you were before. You want to be that person for those people and you search and search and you try to remember but the keys can’t be found.

Imagine the lack of understanding you have to deal with, even when told by the people they understand. Yes, you understand how the other people are frustrated because you can’t be the same. But what can you do about it? Can you make yourself remember and be the same? I guess that’s where the compassion comes in. Imagine the guilt you would have for not remembering. Imagine how you would see these people sad and looking at you to make things better and can’t. Imagine how the insides of you, the amnesiac are ripped apart each time that look is given, that word is said. Imagine how difficult it is for you to even face those situations that will rip them apart. Imagine the depression you would go through. Imagine how you would want it all to end.

All the things of your life that made you who you were and be the way you were and love the way you did have been forgotten—no, they have been taken away. What have they been replaced with? Opportunities for being made to feel like you are stupid and opportunities for guilt because you aren’t ABLE to act as you once did even if you do feel the same way.

Amnesiacs are a rare thing. They look healthy. They look normal. They are great actors. But they can’t do some of the simplest things due to no fault of their own. How many do you know?

Hello, my name is Ronovan. It says so on my notebook on my bed. Nice to meet you . . . again.

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Your Rewards. (Poetry)

haiku-ronovan-writes

I normally have an image with my Haiku. Today I couldn’t come up with one that matched the words that I was able to truly capture what was in my mind. Perhaps later it will come to me but for now here are the words. I believe words some of us can too often identify with. This is my one Challenge Haiku of the week. I do hope you enjoy, or rather not enjoy.

Rare Loving Moments,

Are your rewards for Your Heart,

Receiving Harsh Words?

 

 
Ron_LWI

 

 

 
 
 

@RonovanWrites
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Forever Failure

Forever in dreams,

I am awakened by you,

In final failure.

forever_failure.jpg

Ronovan~Writes~Poetry

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Lost: Death of a Creative Mind

Depressed Man in Dark Room
gettyimages © Original Photo by Michael H

 

 

Why did you do it

Take my mind away

I can’t even maintain focus

Fore even one day

 

You drove the lightning

Deep into my brain

My creations out of my reach

Slowly driving me insane

 

I once could write with ease

The thoughts were defined with clarity

You took it and shook it

Now my mind reads with jealousy

 

Short words in short rhymes

Are all I can manage

Because of the pain

Of this body with damage

 

I had a thought

It came yesterday

Then I fell asleep

That’s when you took it away

 

Don’t worry, no Sir

This is not me making a complaint

It’s not casting blame

It’s just me losing my restraint

 

I’ll be okay tomorrow

After the sun rises

When the moon is gone

My world is full of surprises…again

 

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Another Day Down

Another Day Down

bleeding_hearts_flowers.jpg

Another day down

Another drop of the heart fails

No one really understands it

I speak but they then begin with their own tales

 

 

I am in pain toda . . .

Oh, I understand I feel that way too

My Migrai . . .

Oh take this and you’ll feel better in just a few

 

 

Another day down

Another drop of heart fails

People all around me

Think that they were the blazer of my trails

 

 

I fell and hit my hea . . .

Oh, I’ve been there and done that

Sounds drive me insa . . .

You’ll be fine and okay it’s a fact

 

 

Another day down

Another drop of heart fails

You forget what I am now

Your words are like nails

 

 

I love yo . .

Oh, I know, nothings changed, we’re fine don’t be insane

But you don . . .

No, you just don’t understand my words because of your brain

 

 

Another day down

Another drop of heart fails

Another day of missed out

Another day of misunderstanding Hells

 

 

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