There are so many things, that I cannot see what they mean.

Never knew it was temporary, fool be me.

Reality hits but doesn’t hurt until I feel it.

Making waves is not an occupation but a final destination.

Given a blank check to the heart’s infatuations, to bad the date was an expiration.

My confusion is not an exaggeration.

No longer breathing now I’m alone, can’t scratch the surface of the undertow.

Stories go to the end, but the book never closed.

My words are senseless unless you know.


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© 2014-2023-  Ronovan Hester Copyright reserved. The author asserts his moral and legal rights over this work.


Love Crutch

What cha playin’ at
Think you’re something worthy but your times up
Times up
Times up
So why don’t you just shut up.

Yeah, I’m talkin’ ’bout you
Holdin’ court like you somebody big and tough
Big ‘n Tough
Big ‘n Tough
You’re nothin’ but a chump.

Why do I keep sinkin’, over a stupid weak in,
my armor?
Do you think I’m
a charmer?

Some people like to lay down and say,
they’re prayin’.
But all they do is
keep payin’.

I don’t want a banker to be my heart taker.
Do be a faker.

I want a free thinker, shrinker, a love drinker.
A love strike sinker.

Why do I keep thinkin, about your ever blinkin’?
Your eyes keep sinkin’.
Borin’ holes into my dreamin’.
A home run knockin’ win.

I’m not one to tell much.
But I keep longing for your touch.
Baby I need you in a clutch.
You’re my love crutch.

Love Crutch Image

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 © Copyright-All rights reserved by 2016

Confused Clarity.

Hope of later days,

It gets in all of my ways,

This crystal clear maze.

Confused Clarity a Haiku

Amber Wake: Gabriel Falling by PS Bartlett and Ronovan HesterRonovan Hester is an author, with his debut historical adventure novel Amber Wake: Gabriel Falling due out in February 14, 2016. He shares his life through his blog His love of poetry, authors and community through his online world has lead to the creation of a site dedicated to book reviews, interviews and author resources known as

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© Copyright-All rights reserved by 2016

for the someone

for the someone poem by Ronovan

I reckon I can find a way
A way to say it
But don’t betray it
Cause I don’t know if my heart can take it
Playing with a somber tempo
Baby I used to solo
Not sure about this
But I’ll give it all I’ve got to . . . know

Why am I so jaded
Has my love line faded
Do you know what I’m hopin’
Keep the windows open
Shine those rays over
Taking me slower
To the extreme
Kisses are splendid
Broken dreams are mended
Our senses are blended
When we are of one
My walls are forming
Memories are storming
Time for performing
Why do I turn and run
My knees are bruising
So sore from overusing
Tumbling from confusing
Please give me something to hold on . . . to
Slippin’ on pages
Filled with rages
Somehow never engages
Now fighting for someone
Tell me your staying
No more delaying
Baby I’m praying
For you the one
Why am I so jaded
Has my love line faded
Do you know what I’m hopin’
Keep those windows open
Shine those rays over
Taking me slower
To the extreme

for the someone


© Copyright-All rights reserved by 2015

Your Rewards. (Poetry)


I normally have an image with my Haiku. Today I couldn’t come up with one that matched the words that I was able to truly capture what was in my mind. Perhaps later it will come to me but for now here are the words. I believe words some of us can too often identify with. This is my one Challenge Haiku of the week. I do hope you enjoy, or rather not enjoy.

Rare Loving Moments,

Are your rewards for Your Heart,

Receiving Harsh Words?






On GoodReads
On Facebook
On Google+

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© Copyright-All rights reserved by 2015

Truth buried deep within… (A poem)

The truth of it is,

Something you don’t want to know,

Is my love runs deep.

How deep you may ask,

Does it run into this man,

Whose truth is a search?

That truth is a loss,

Of something he cannot find,

Buried dark and deep.

But with truth in love,

I will return to the light,

So deep in us all.

silhouette of man looking out window with flare
gettyimages © Original Photo by Tara Moore


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© Copyright-All rights reserved by 2014

Sunday Thought: Be Still and Know

I read an article by someone I have come to consider a good friend of mine, Allison at Long & Luxe, and a phrase she used reminded me of one of my favorite all time scriptures.


Sunset Pear Harbor
gettyimages © Original Photo by Kathy Collins

“He says, “Be still, and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth.”-Psalm 46:10


Each person reading this has different beliefs and we each have something we turn to that brings us comfort and peace. During a period where I was dealing with high blood pressure, which due to my weight loss I no longer have, and some newly found health problems at the time my world was chaotic. My mind was not able to focus and things had no stability to me.


I’m not one to believe in coincidences. Some people say God doesn’t speak to them. I say they just don’t recognize his language.


During this time two things happened:

One Wednesday night at church we broke up into different groups and prayed for each other. The one praying for me prayed for peace and focus in my life without my saying a word of my need.


The next week, as I was functioning as the Youth Pastor for my church, I took our youth to a Steven Curtis Chapman concert. For those of you not familiar with him, he is an American Contemporary Christian music legend. Some say he even broke the boundaries and brought music of a type that spoke to a new generation of Christians.


During the concert Chapman had the lights turned down low and it was just him and his guitar. And he sang this song.

Be still and know that He is God
Be still and know that He is holy
Be still oh, restless soul of mine
Bow before the Prince of Peace
Let the noise and clamor cease

Be still and know that He is God
Be still and know that He is faithful
Consider all that He has done
Stand in awe and be amazed
And know that He will never change
Be still

Be still and know that He is God
Be still and know that He is God
Be still and know that He is God
Be still, be speechless

Be still and know that He is God
Be still and know He is our Father
Come rest your head upon His chest
Listen to the rhythm of
His unfailing heart of love
Beating for His little ones
Calling each of us to come
Be still, be still

As I said, I don’t believe in coincidences. I recognized God’s voice in what was going on around me. This was in 2008 and has been a mantra of mine ever since. Be still and know God is God and that there are things beyond your control, things you just have to pray about. Give the grief and the sorrows to Him. Let God be God.


Since an accident in my home in the summer of 2013 I’ve been through some tough times. One thing that has never left me is the Word of God. This verse keeps me going. I’ve expanded on it as I’ve studied the Bible more and taken a fresh look at how Christianity is today.


“Be still and Let God be God and people be people.”


I see the slogans and shirts about “Be calm . . .” or “Stay calm . . .” If I have to rely on people to bring me peace and calm, I’ll just give up now. My phrase means just stay calm and be yourself and LET God take care of the rest and LET people be the people they are and wish to be. Yes, as a Christian believing in Heaven and Hell I will share with someone what I think because I love them, no matter who they are, but I’m not going to force them to be what they don’t want to be. Jesus didn’t do that, and he’s the one I follow.


I heard Be Still and Know for the first time at that concert weeks before Chapman lost one of the three daughters he adopted from China. His youngest son ran over her in his truck as she ran to him. He didn’t see her. Chapman kept yelling to his son as he drove off after the helicopter taking his daughter away “I love you son. I love you.” Chapman eventually was able to record again. Was able to be still and know.

Much Love




2014 © Copyright-All rights

The Lost Minded Heart

The Lost Minded Heart

by: Ronovan


Depressed Man in Dark Room
gettyimages © Original Photo by Michael H

Oh this mind I have.

It seeks to tear itself from my skull,

And scatter its sanity across the wind.

It denies me all things that I crave.

Long sequenced words to form thoughts,

Escape behind a mesh door, seen but unattainable.

This mind knows it is a piercing pain of storm and fury.

How I hate it.

It laughs and runs and races and calls and shouts and screams and twists.

Do I mind?

Ha! What mind do I have to mind with?

But how does one without a mind each day continue on?

How does the mindless give, how does it give hope?

How does the less minded give encouragement?


The Lost Mind still has heart.


2014 © Copyright-All rights



by: Ronovan the Lost Mind

Prism xray like image

These limbs I hate

Give me a saw

But how would I do it

Without them at all


So they ache

My fingers pain

I keep writing these words

Driving me slowly insane


I have happiness

But why do I fight

I hang onto the madness

With all of my might


Is it that the pain

Is something that is always mine

Is it that it will never leave

Is it because I’ll never be fine


Spin around twice

Capture the light in a bottle of green

Shake it up

It looks quite obscene


Yeah that just came to me

In the middle of this thought

Now you see what I deal with

It’s something I’ve always fought


Bring on the words

And throw out the time

Days mean nothing

When you have no kept mind


You probably been thinking

This boy is crazy crazy

But to know the whole truth

My brains just dazy hazy


The luminary softness glow

Cascades across her ebon locks

Enticing my thoughts to danger

Worth death of all for one kiss


I went off in another direction

My mind is distracted by a world aflamed

What does it all mean

I’m learning not to ever feel ashamed


Let your thoughts flow

Just get it out of your system

Cause if you hold it in

You’ll be fractured psyched like a prism



Image Credit: gettyimages© Original Photo by Steve Satushek /The Image Bank

© Copyright-All rights

Confusion of not knowing the Known

Confusion of not knowing the Known

by: Ronovan


Twisted Confused Metal Sculpture


Is not knowing

Better than never having

Or is it better to have and know

And to have lost it while still knowing

Than to not know if you never have



The experience is a sensation

Of heart and of mind and of soul

But what if you don’t remember

What if you just had to be told

You still don’t know



But you realize it was so

Now you must think on this

To love and lost or not at all

What if you loved and lost

And did not know at all



Which is more painful

Knowing and knowing

Never knowing the known

Or realizing but not knowing

That what you know you don’t know



gettyimages © Original Photo by Marie Hickman

© Copyright-All rights 01, 2014.

Afraid to be Nice

Afraid to be Nice

by: Ronovan



I tried to be nice

But I was told it might not be that way

It’s not that I was bad

It’s not that I did wrong or was anything I had to say


But for a heart wearer

Who has lost how the world may work

Things can be breaking

When chastised remotely I feel like a jerk


You say get over it

And I will try in my time and way

But live in my shoes

The hurt is the only thing that will stay


Now I question everything I do

Will I write the wrong word or comment

Will I use the wrong image

All these doubts and questions spin in a torrent


I am a dweller

I live in the heart of emotion

I cannot shake it

My heart is my devotion



© Copyright-All rights 16, 2014.


My poetry Tears at Me

My poetry Tears at Me

by: Ronovan

 Lost Man in Chair


I’m sorry my words don’t speak in romantic filled embraces.

My language is built from elementary understanding of feelings.

I attempt to translate my true thoughts into a message to convey.

Above all my words are meant for my own wounds’ self healings.


My page opens with clear intent for a jovial sharing.

By the second word typed the mindlessness takes control.

It’s not that things don’t make me laugh or I find comical.

But in my world the only thing full of ideas is the crazy bowl.


Left to my own creative and undirected devices I stray.

What comes out of my fingertips are words that I never would share.

I wonder sometimes what the powers that be would do with them.

But I push the letters in their neat little rows and print them as if I didn’t care.


Therapy of the mind and heart is what some people call poetry.

For me it’s the feeling of razor blades over delicate skin tearing at me.

I lay here exposed and bleeding as the words and thoughts force their way free.

But whatever people may say of this they know I must be what I am to be.


© Copyright-All rights 14, 2014.